Epic Yankee Doodle Muscle Car Fails

As the Christmas season closes in, and people forget that it isn’t merely about buying presents, eating an irrelevant turkey, and not realizing that the day Jesus was born – December 25th – is actually a pagan invention. Religious scholars argue that there is no definitive date to accurately know for ceratin on what day baby Jesus was born.

But whenever Jesus was born we do know he was unable to afford a muscle car. Muscle cars are inherently associated with Americana when the days of Apple pie was as rife as busing and when segregation was very, very, very slowly declining.


The American Muscle car culture gave way to a new breed of Yankee Doodle banditos. These cars were typically rear-wheel drive with as much power extracted from the yeee-haww V8 as one can possibly extract.

And the American Muscle car eventually gave way to the culture of “muscle car fails”. Very much a 21st-century invention. The one question we ask is, what would Jesus say now?


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