Ireland’s Answer To Missy Elliot Reviews The Bloody Awful Tiguan Allspace

You gotta love that Irish accent, indeed we became so inspired by Sinead McCann’s Irish accent that we spent the morning trying and failing to perfect our own Irish accents… before we realised it was racist and Prince Andrew levels of shamefulness. At least we sweated out our shame.

But let us put our lack of self-awareness to one side. Sinead McCann is a motoring journalist for carsireland.ie where the cars are so pretty in Dublin’s fair city. And she gets to review a lot of cars, so many that she has become an expert reviewer.


But we disagree with her review of the Tiguan Allspace. In all honesty, and in our opinion, it’s a rather softball review because we have a VW Tiguan long-termer… and… it’s bloody awful.

The Tiguan’s standard suspension is bloody awful. Interior build quality is best in class but the perceived quality is… bloody awful. The DSG shifts very fast but at low speed it’s… bloody awful.

We have a theory VW is deliberately shitting on us because other reviewers have made similar “surprisingly good” softball comments about the bloody awful Tiguan.

I wonder why we no longer receive invites to press launches.

It’s difficult to understand, it really is. A mystery we will never solve. We ought to be more like Sinead McCann


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